Every Reason to Love Caps, From a Self-Professed Hat Addict

I used to be someone who excessively bought headgear for what I thought was no good reason other than plugging into the zeitgeist of quirky fashion statements brought on by that embroidered Balenciaga peak cap that riffed on the Bernie Sanders campaign logo, in response to the Trump MAGA cap. You know the one? Still following? If not, you’ll have to go on your own journey of discovering how fashion trends hinge on the socio-political climates we’re living through. This is not that chat.

I know you just got here and I’m digressing already, but as I arrived home from one of the aforementioned excessive spending sprees to face the judgement of a friend saying “Dude, I think you’ve got enough of those”, I was trying to find the exact words to explain why, in fact, I don’t. Why you can really never have enough of those. Needless to say I never did and I had to admit in that moment that I have a problem – I’m addicted to hats.

So here I am. Consider this a kind of a healing gathering of people all listening to me work through my addiction.

Hi. My name is Akim and I’ve got a hat problem…

I don’t know if I would call it a problem really. They are a very practical life tool – the Swiss army knife of the fashion accessory world. Think about every time your mom, gran, aunt would yell “put on a cap please!” (in my case usually accompanied by some stern Afrikaans that really let you know that she wasn’t playing around). Now think about every time you didn’t listen because you definitely thought you were invincible and that sunburn doesn’t apply to you… Put on a cap please!

Peeling, burning nose skin aside. Raise your hand if you’ve ever been a victim of your barber’s bad judgement (they call it ‘creative license’ I think). If you’re not the kind of guy that feels comfortable taking clippers to your hair to make it all go away yourself, I bet you’re already half on my side. I’m at a stage in my life where I’m comfortable to go to the barber with a cap in-hand and put it on before I’ve left the shop when I’m unhappy. Not only is it a political and practical sunblocking tool, but also an easy way of letting someone know that you don’t appreciate their creativity on your head.

 

When I’m not always using my accessories as insults they do carry out some kind of aesthetic role. They’re sometimes the one little thing that says, “Hey, this guy really thought about this fit.” My go-to for making a lazy look seem considered is matching the colour or texture of my cap to pretty much anything else I’m wearing. This next bit is pretty much take it or leave it advice but if you’re keen to up the ante on a look consider matching colours or textures from head-to-toe. Looking back the one saving grace of that Justin-Britney Canadian tuxedo moment must be the matching denim cowboy hat. It really took some nerve. We applaud the courage if nothing else, right?

 

Bernie Sanders, Swiss army knife, sunburn, bad haircuts and Justin Timberlake aside – we’re cool guys, right? Cool guys wear caps, sir.

 

Akim Jardine – MKM guest fashion editor